Our Adoption Journey to Ray

Three Months Home

2010-08-18T20:43:00.063-05:00

It is truly amazing how fast young children adapt to their surroundings. Ray understands almost everything we say to him and can respond to most things in simple yet understandable English. He is also very good with directions and knows exactly which roads take him home, to grandparent's houses, to swimming, to shopping, to school, to friend's houses, and more. I am sure this gives him a sense of comfort in knowing where he is so he can feel safe. And, as long as we give him enough timely reminders of the day's schedule, he flows through the day without too much complaint. He has gotten closer to his grandparents and cousins enough to spend a few nights away from us even. Plus, his eating habits are getting less picky and more open to trying different tastes. Foods that he wouldn't touch weeks ago he now asks for (tomatoes, oatmeal, beans, etc.) and things that he ate all the time (bologna) he no longer wants. Perhaps his favorite nighttime book "Green Eggs and Ham" has had something to do with that!

We are finally getting on a regular sleep/wake schedule and discipline is starting to pay off. Thanks to SuperNanny's advice, the "Naughty Spot" has helped Ray understand that we're only disciplining the behavior and not telling him that he's a bad boy in general. It gives him time to think about what was done wrong (and hopefully try not to do it again) and sincerely apologize. Of course, we still have to set him on the spot 10-15 times before he stays put...but we are told that will lessen the more he understands that we will not give in.

Parenting is not getting any easier but is at least a little more predictable. The hardest thing is to blend different family traditions into one and create our own family dynamic and a unified team. All our free time and energy seems to be reading every parenting and adoption bonding book out there and discussing what is going right and what is not working and needs improvement. Too often emotions get in the way of constructive discussions. Then again, we have to remind ourselves that we're new parents and most people with new babies certainly don't have it all figured out in only three months nor do they have to deal with 8-year-old issues right away. So we try to move forward on a positive path.

One prayer constantly running through our heads is: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.

Ray starts 3rd grade on September 7th along with trying Tae Kwon Do at the YMCA. Scheduling and homework are going to be our next challenges. Stay tuned!

Ann and Bryan

First ER Visit

2010-07-09T22:53:00.035-05:00

Daddy learned a quick lesson today that we shouldn't bike with sandals but rather with shoes! Ray now has 11 stitches in his right foot. He wanted to see where Mommy goes to exercise and he jumped on a stationary bike and started to pedal fast. I took a quick call on my phone and then a few seconds later heard a big scream as Ray's foot was caught in the pedal and there was blood everywhere. His sandal fell off and took off a big chunk of skin right down to the tendons. Good thing the emergency room was just around the corner and the folks at the YMCA did a quick job of bandaging up Ray's foot. Our little trooper is doing well and even the doctor was amazed at how interested Ray was in the process without too much crying. We're all doing fine tonight; in fact, we're laughing because we explained to Ray "no soccer, no swimming" and so then, of course, Ray said, "no school!" Now he thinks he can get out of everything. Overall, I think Daddy was more nervous about this one then Ray.

Thanks for thinking of us!
Bryan

Six Weeks Home

2010-06-30T22:21:00.002-05:00

Wow! Is it really the end of June already?!? Time sure does fly!

Ray had fun the week of June 14th going to Vacation Bible School (which he called Cross School) learning about God's word and making new friends. He enjoyed singing some songs for us at home that he learned but then froze on stage when the children sang for the World Mission Festival on Sunday. He did do some of the hand gestures for the last song so he must have just been warming up when they were finished. Oh, well...he did enjoy the food from around the world...especially the sushi from Japan and fruit from Thailand! And Daddy was beaming with pride as he shared in the love of God with his son on Father's Day. Ray bought Daddy a new helmet for riding bicycle with him and we all enjoyed "Toy Story 3" at the movie theater.

The next week he started summer school at the public school. He was shy and nervous the first day but the next morning he woke up an hour and a half before we needed to leave and was ready to go to school "fast"! He loves the word fast thanks to Aunt Sara teaching him how fast she can go in the convertible! Being in a classroom has helped his English develop and introduced him to how schools are organized in America. He has also made some more new friends which we are hoping will help him feel more comfortable in September when he starts full time school.

Yesterday Ray decided he was ready to take the training wheels off of his bike and ride like a big boy...he is doing great! This weekend will be exciting since Ray will be introduced to lots more extended family and close friends all arriving for Independence Day celebrations. We already know that he loves fireworks since we took him to see the ones in Ephraim for FyrBal Festival so he's super excited that we'll get two and maybe even three days of fireworks this weekend.

Tuesday, July 13th is our first of three post-placement visits. It will be interesting to see how Ray responds to her questioning. We are not too worried about it though...more curious as to what will be asked/expected. Ray's test results came back from Children's Hospital showing very little to be overly concerned about (also nothing surprised us...reports from Thailand were very accurate). In fact, most of his US-born cousins and friends have more allergies and ailments than he does!

Our summer calendar is full of fun and learning. Summer school ends July 15th. Hopefully we'll make it to see our nephew's baseball game on July 17th in Burlington. If schedules work out, we may visit with another adoptive family on July 19th to meet Ray's friend who was adopted from the TRC a year or two ago. We will have a re-affirmation celebration of Ray's baptism in church on July 25th. The last soccer game of the summer is on July 27th. Daddy and Ray will check out Packer Stadium and Hall of Fame on July 29th. Ray, Mommy, Grandpa and Nana Jeanne plan to visit EAA Airventure in Oshkosh on August 1st. We're thinking he might like swimming lessons from August 2nd through 13th. A group of friends will be meeting at Bay Beach in Green Bay on August 8th for fun park adventures. Ray's got a gift card he can't wait to use to see a musical at American Folklore Theatre sometime in August. And of course there are many new friends and cousins to have play dates with before the summer is over. Phew!

How is his English coming along? This is the most common question asked of us. Although it is important, it is not the focus of everything we do on a daily basis. (Yes; we do have reading time and alphabet time each day.) Attachment and bonding are top priority at the moment. Without these things, learning can never really happen properly. This sentiment gets grounded into every adoptive parent in required pre-adoption educational classes and books but you really cannot grasp the true importance until the child is in your home. We find ourselves trying to get close to him each day to let him know he is loved unconditionally, that he is safe, and that this is his forever family. Recently, Ray has decided to open up and share his past with us by telling us stories from events at the orphanage or his Thailand school. It is a little hard to understand since it is told in broken English and lots of hand gestures and noises but most of it comes through. We feel honored that he is comfortable enough already to begin telling us his life story. This is a milestone that far outweighs language. He is connecting with us emotionally and that's exciting progress!

Three Weeks Home

2010-06-08T22:56:00.001-05:00

Wow, what a roller coaster ride we're on, otherwise known as parenthood! Ray is doing amazingly well for a little boy who has just been plunked down into a whole new world. He likes sleeping with his multiple Mickey Mouses under his rainbow-colored bedspread in his own room. And he's picking up on Mommy and Daddy's habits of sleeping in...until 9am! Guess we'll have to change that once he starts summer school in a week and a half.

It's hard to put into words what it's been like adjusting to being parents for the first time and for him adjusting to a family. It is taking a while to find a "normal" routine of sorts...but it is summer so there's no real set structure each day. So far we've been to three birthday parties (in the first week home), a volunteer of the year awards banquet (Mommy got a Golden Heart award), went to the Wildlife Sanctuary with Nana Jeanne's Kindergarten class and visited the classroom a few days later for playtime, went to the NEW Zoo with new friends, went to THE Farm with new friends, gone swimming frequently at various locations, went to the Mayfest parade and played baseball with cousins, had a full medical wellness check in Milwaukee (3 hour drive), did lots of shopping for new clothes, toys, a bike and outdoor activities, went on a picnic and hiking with new friends, and joined a soccer team and played in his first of three games this week! Whew!!! He is soaking it all in and learning more than we know. He has already spoken 4-5 full sentences without any prompting. It is truly amazing how much young minds can absorb in a short amount of time!

Don't get us wrong, it has not been all peaches and roses. Ray's favorite word is No and it is usually his first response to everything...even if we know he likes it. Eating has been a struggle as well...not necessarily an aversion to the foods but more defiance in sitting down to eat with us in the first place. It is getting better though. We started a sticker chart for helping Mommy and Daddy and one of those marks is for eating meals with us. I know this will not work for long but it's getting us through for now. Ray is also into everything...a big time explorer...which is good and bad sometimes depending on the location and situation. And, unfortunately, he learned to defend himself in the orphanage by pinching and hitting...which he still does when he doesn't get his way or is frustrated. We are trying to be gentle with him even when we're disciplining so that he understands that he is safe and no longer needs to act out physically.

All-in-all we are a happy threesome and we are all learning from one another day by day. There is lots of laughter in our home which fills our hearts with gladness and love.

We Are Home!

2010-05-18T21:09:00.002-05:00

The plane rides could not have gone better. Ray was so excited about planes that he jumped out of bed at 2am when the alarm went off and was swooping his arm while jumping up and down to indicate the plane flying. He managed to sleep probably about 6 hours out of the 18 hours in the air. We had two layovers of 2 hours each so he could run around and get some food (he didn't like the plane food). The flight from Bangkok to Tokyo was a nice 6 hour trip with TV screens on the back of each seat that played movies and video games. That kept him totally occupied...although the button for calling the stewardess was pushed one too many times...we had to keep waving them off...hopefully they understood. The 11 hour flight only had a movie screen in the middle for everyone and the movies didn't start until about half way through the trip. Luckily we had matchbox cars, bendy wax craft sticks, and card games to help pass the time.

I was nervous about Customs/Immigration in Minneapolis but it went VERY smoothly and only took about 10 minutes. The immigration officer remarked that he was glad that the Bangkok US Embassy actually had all the appropriate documentation and everything was in order. I told him that I was glad to hear him say that since we barely even got the Visa and paperwork before it all shut down in the emergency situation. The Thai worker handed us the packets so quickly I was wondering if he had everything in order or if the envelopes may have mistakenly been swapped with another family.

On the last flight from Minneapolis to Green Bay, Ray slept the whole way even though it was only an hour. We were enthusiastically greeted by both new sets of grandparents, great Nana, and Aunt Shelly and Uncle John waving US flags and holding a US flag sign with Ray's name on it. Tears of joy were shed by all and hugs and kisses all over. But we were dead tired...so we got our bags and were off driving the 45 minutes to home.

I keep praying for the people of Thailand and the safety of the children at the Thai Red Cross. Things are getting even worse in Bangkok right now...red shirts are setting buildings on fire now instead of just the tires. We got out just in time...there's now a curfew from 8pm-6am and they warned that early morning flights might have significant delays...we had a 5:55am flight and that would have been bad for us. Anyway, the TRC is right in the heart of all the horrible violence and fires. Please have everyone you know pray for the children at the orphanage and the workers trying to get in to work to care for them!

Thank you all for your prayers...it's what got us through all the tough times and kept us safe in Bangkok.

Last Weekend in Thailand

2010-05-17T06:30:00.000-05:00

It was hard to say good-bye to the social workers from the TRC and to the Sutton family all in one day on Friday. Because of the emotional overload, that's really all we did. Hopefully we will see them all some time in the future.

Saturday, May 15th
We went to Chatuchak Market today for some authentic Thai crafts...it was HUGE and full of Farangs (foreign tourists like us). We had fun bargaining with the sellers and got some really nice things. Finished the day by watching "Fantasia" with Ray...he loved it...especially the Sorcerer's Apprentice with Mickey!

Sunday, May 16th
We had a great day today outside the city of Bangkok. Local friends picked us up and dropped us off in their red BMW. They took us to the ancient city of Ayutthaya, the former capital of Thailand from 1350 to 1767. It is about an hour and a half drive from our hotel. We went to a Buddhist temple with (they claim) the largest Buddha in the world. It's called Wihan Phra Mongkhon Bophit. Then we went to Klong Sabua floating market and ate lunch while watching a historical performance at the only Water Theatre in Thailand. Ray really enjoyed this part of the day! Afterwords we got some Sai Mai for dessert which is something like cotton candy wrapped in a crepe. Ray LOVES this so much he didn't want to share at first. We ended the day at the former Grand Palace now referred to as the Ancient Palace (Bang Pa-In Palace). It is much different from the Grand Palace in Bangkok as it is more spacious and less grandiose. I enjoyed it as is was more peaceful and quite....even thought it was raining today.

Our friends explained to Ray at the end of the day that in one more night we will be flying to America and his face lit up with excitement. I think he's curious about the plane ride mostly. But it made us both happy to see that he is ready to come home with us!

TODAY - Monday, May 17th
We have nothing planned today other than PACKING!!! We'll leave between 2-3am for the airport (which is 2-3pm Monday WI time). Last day in the Land of Smiles!

So Much To Tell

2010-05-14T06:06:00.000-05:00

OK. We haven't posted since last week and so much has happened. This will be a brief outline of events so you get an idea.

Friday, May 7th
We went back to the TRC and played with the boys until about 11am. At that point, we said good-bye to the TRC staff and other children and went for lunch. Our Visa medical appointment was at 1pm and pre-scheduled for us by the TRC staff. We did have to wait an hour or two for document processing even though the check-ups themselves were very short. Ray passed his eye exams very well. They mentioned he is under-weight but we already knew that. Back at the hotel via Sky Train we all crashed at 6pm and didn't wake up until the next morning.

Saturday, May 8th
We went shopping this morning at Tesco-Lotus and Carrfour. We bought some basic groceries and tons of bottled water. Also, we got Ray a small Spider Man remote control car to play with in the hotel room...he loves it! Ray picked out a watch for Daddy that flashes in different colors. Daddy needed it since his watch stopped working the day before we got on the plane. At noon, the Lutheran pastor who is a missionary here in Chiang Mai came to visit us in the hotel. He wanted to meet Ray and explain to him in Thai who God is and what it means to be a Christian. Pastor Rob and his wife Nora were very good with him and we enjoyed their company throughout the afternoon.

Sunday, May 9th
No words can describe how wonderful my Mother's Day was! Ray (and Bryan) gave me a Mom necklace this morning and it brought tears to my eyes. Ray is now a Child of God, having been baptized in our room and then introduced to church. He sat pretty well for his first church service and I had tears in me when he and Bryan sat in the front for the children's moment. We then had lunch with pastor and his wife and said our good-byes. Back at the hotel, Ray and I were in the pool for 4 hours. He is such a fish...maybe the next Michael Phelps!

Monday, May 10th
I checked an item off my bucket list today by visiting the Grand Palace in Bangkok. Ever since I portrayed Anna in "The King & I" it only seemed natural to want to visit but it was so much more exciting to be there with my little Thai prince and fabulous hubby! Although, I have to say it was the hottest I have ever been...perhaps 2-3pm in the afternoon on a clear day in the hot season of Thailand is not the greatest day to be touring. But, we did have the advantage of very small crowds so we could take great photos without others in them. The rest of the day we lounged and swam some more. Heat exhaustion is really wiping us out!

Tuesday, May 11th
We took a trip outside of the city to visit an Elephant Village and Crocodile Farm. We went with the other family so the boys could enjoy it together (and so Bryan could get his group discount). Ray and I got to ride on one of the elephants and then we had a family photo standing by a smaller one. The elephant even gave me a hug! In the evening we went with the pastor's former exchange student to eat some traditional Thai food. What he thought was mild was very spicy to us but it was very good!

Wednesday, May 12th
We went for the Child Adoption Board meeting at the Thai Government building. We were #4 in line and the Sutton's were #6 so we didn't have to wait too long for the interview. We had to get to the TRC by 9am and they took us to the CAB meeting in their van. We sat in front of "the board" which consisted of three ladies. They asked questions such as why we chose Thailand, and why we chose an older child, what our jobs were, our plan for his education, etc. Ray was in the meeting as well and the TRC has certainly done an outstanding job of explaining to him what is happening because he had huge smiles when they asked if he was happy with his family and if he wanted to go to the U.S. The meeting ended with their words, "He is yours!" Afterwords we stopped at the BMK Mall to eat lunch and find Ray this Ben 10 watch that he wanted. Once back at the hotel his first words were "Daddy Swim, Mommy Swim!" over and over again. I think he's growing gills! Just like Mommy was at his age.

Thursday, May 13th
We were at the US Embassy at 7:30am with a room full of mostly Thai people. Besides the Sutton family that has been staying with us, we met two other American couples, one from Tennessee who was also adopting an 8 year old boy and another couple from Michigan adopting an 18 month old girl. They had only email contact with us before we traveled here. The interview questions were much more thorough than the CAB meeting, probably just to verify that we knew everything about Ray's history and that we are financially stable and prepared for a child. We had Ray's Visa approved after about 2.5 hours of waiting and we we were told to return at 3pm to pick it up.

Between appointments, we went to celebrate with the Sutton family at The Dubliner Irish Pub near our hotel and I was in my glory because I had Shepherd's Pie! And, of course, Ray wanted to swim a little while before heading back to the Embassy.

Now for the "interesting" part of our day. When we took a cab the second time to pick up the Visas and we couldn't believe that the cab driver was playing Christian music and when we asked if he was a believer he said "Alleluia!" When we got to the Embassy at 3pm they had closed early due to the protests and we were not allowed in. He also mentioned that the Embassy would be closed on Friday due to the police forcing the protesters out of the area...it may get violent. At this time we were a little disappointed and maybe a bit nervous but we knew we're not scheduled to leave until Tuesday so we could have possibly gone back Monday. We continued to push to be let in and the Thai guard would not budge and kept saying there was an emergency closing of the Embassy. About a minute later an American Embassy worker was walking back into the building and he stepped in to our argument and told us he would take care of it and get us our children's Visas. Two minutes later we were in the building and in 15 minutes we had our paperwork. It truly was a miracle that God sent us this gentleman at the exact moment to let us all in. When we got Ray's Visa, you could tell the ink was still wet, hot off the printing press! Even the worker that handed us the Visas looked nervous as he was very anxious to get the heck out of there! Well, as Paul Harvey would say, now you know "the rest of the story." We eventually caught a cab in a traffic jam and went back to our hotel and breathed a sigh of relief.

We went swimming, ordered pizza in and enjoyed a nice meal with the Sutton's before hitting the hay for the night.

TODAY - Friday, May 14th
We're just laying low today and staying in the area of our hotel where it's safe from protesters and gun fire. We were supposed to go to the TRC this afternoon for a farewell party for the Ray, Aaron, and the children BUT because of the military blockade being right in front of the orphanage, we decided not to go. It's too bad for the children but we want to be safe. Khun Vo called to tell us that even she did not go into work today. She'll be stopping by our hotel this afternoon to say her own farewells to the boys. We have not yet changed our plane tickets but we might look into it if the cost is not too much and we can get seating together. Either way, we know God is watching over us and we'll soon be home.

- Ann

We Meet At Last

2010-05-06T20:35:00.000-05:00

We started out the day with yet another blessing as our pastor's former exchange student, a local, met us in the lobby at our hotel and took us to the Thai Red Cross via the Sky Train. We would not have found it without him.

Things could not have gone any smoother than they did today...God certainly provides. We were SO nervous about everything and how it would play out but as soon as Ray ran into the room, all worries melted away. Of course, Daddy was the favorite for the day. Being around women social workers means that Bryan is a novelty. I'm just glad he didn't hesitate to come to us and I did get hugs later on.

Ray loved our camera and he actually took more photos than we did. We just keep thinking what a good memory this will be for him to have taken pictures of his friends. A lot of the children just wanted to be picked up and held and we certainly do wish we could adopt another child, but one at a time...especially since Ray is into EVERYTHING!

We were not sure how long we'd get to be with Ray today but it ended up being 9:30am-3:30pm...a full day for all. It was hard to leave him there but we know it will be harder yet tomorrow for the social workers to say good-bye as they are very attached to him.

Some surprises for the day were when the social workers pulled out the HUGE bag for Ray filled with clothes and toys that they said we could take with us. We were told he would not be able to take anything from the orphanage except the things we sent him and now we're leaving with a TON of stuff. Good thing we have an extra suitcase after emptying the one of the donations we brought for the orphanage.

Then, the social workers also had already scheduled the hospital Visa medical visit for us tomorrow with a specific doctor. We thought we'd have to figure that part of this process out on our own. Plus, they let us go to the mall for lunch with Ray for 2.5 hours so we got a little shopping in for a Mickey Mouse backpack to use as Ray's airplane carry-on.

I think we're both a bit overwhelmed by the whole day and SUPER happy to be the proud parents of this energetic little boy with a big smile. We cannot wait to get back there tomorrow at 9:30am, spend some time saying good-bye to the wonderful staff at the TRC, and to bring him back with us to the hotel.

Luckily, our pastor's former exchange student will again be available and is very willing to help us navigate our way back to the TRC and safely past the protesters. The ladies at the orphanage liked him helping us so much that he actually was asked to help another family's adoption coming up and he happily agreed. What a wonderful young man...a true blessing for us. We could not thank him enough and we will be thanking our pastor and his wife for making the connection more than words can say.

We are speechless.
Love to all!
Ann & Bryan

Drum Roll Please...Off We Go!

2010-04-22T21:55:00.000-05:00

It's taken 20 months to get to this point and now it seems like a whirlwind all at once. We are now only 10 days away from boarding a plane to Bangkok and becoming parents up-close-and-personal rather than just on paper. That's right, we got our travel dates!!! We'll be flying out of Green Bay on Monday, May 3rd and hopefully returning home on May 19th...just 3 days before Bryan turns 33. Plus, Ann has the added bonus of being with our son on Mother's Day.

Somehow we thought we'd have 2-3 weeks to prepare for travel and now it feels like we're racing to the finish line. Of course, this metaphor is incorrect since this is only the beginning of our journey as a family of three. What more can we say? We're thrilled, excited, nervous, joyful, thankful, etc.

Thanks to everyone for your encouragement, support, and guidance. We could not have gotten through this process without your love and prayers.

Love,
Bryan & Ann

PS - We'll try to keep you all updated...check your emails...keep your cell phones on...watch for status update on Ann's Facebook page...and please keep us in your prayers.

The Busier the Better

2010-03-31T20:23:00.023-05:00

We had a whirlwind trip to Green Bay and Milwaukee today. A few weeks ago we set up today's appointment with the Bellin Travel Clinic to discuss our travel plans and what to be cautious with, health-wise, while in Bangkok. She also hooked us up with prescription antibiotics in case of emergency while abroad and some pills (thankfully not a shot) for Typhoid that is recommended for Thailand travelers by the CDC. We got some good info and are realizing that this trip really is going to happen soon!

Then, we headed to the USCIS building in Milwaukee to update our fingerprints. This was actually quite the accomplishment on our end since we took the initiative to contact the Hague adoption document processing immigration officer who was assigned our case. Through email we discovered that she had received our paperwork on Friday, March 26th but was not able to process it until we got our fingerprint updates. She then told us that the fingerprinting was scheduled for April 20th (which we didn't know yet since we hadn't gotten the notices in the mail at that point). Monday night the notices appeared in our mailbox and we contacted our immigration officer again via email to see if there was any chance we could get in early this week or next week so we could move our paperwork along. She was very helpful and so was the lady at the office in Milwaukee. With about 6-7 emails back and forth, we were able to schedule an early fingerprinting today at 1:45pm. So immediately after our travel clinic appointment ended at 11:20am, we dropped in quickly at Subway and sped our way down to Milwaukee. We got there with only 5 minutes to spare. Whew!

So, after all that, we hope now that our paperwork will continue through USCIS and on to the Thai consulate so we can get our actual travel date. Keep us in your prayers for a speedy process and we'll keep proactively contacting those in charge (politely) to help the process along.

Ann & Bryan

We Got THE Call!

2010-02-17T05:50:00.001-06:00

Last night, as we were going out to eat to celebrate Fat Tuesday/Mardi Gras, we got the call from WACAP. The one we've been waiting for since September. She said she got a very small package from the TRC today and it contained our "To Whom It May Concern" letter from the Thai government. Good things certainly do come in small packages!

This sets in motion our paperwork towards our travel date. Right now, WACAP estimates that we'll travel by May (hopefully in time for Mother's Day or maybe Bryan's birthday) IF all of our paperwork is in order and processes through "the system" without a hitch. Please continue to keep us in your prayers for a swift and clean process since our immigration paperwork expires on May 13th. So we're down to the wire! But at this point, we feel certain that we'll finally be with our son this summer. It truly is a blessing and God has once again surprised us with perfect timing.

What a great belated Valentine's Day gift!
Love to all from Ann & Bryan

Love Across the Oceans

2010-02-13T13:45:00.001-06:00

It's hard to believe that it is Valentine's Day weekend already. Months ago we thought "maybe" we'd have our paperwork in order and getting ready for travel at this point. Unfortunately, that is not the case. We wait. We are getting frustrated since the time lines keep getting extended. At first we were told 1-2 months from I-800 to travel, then 2-4 months, and now WACAP states 3-7 months. Yikes! And here we are still waiting for the TWIMC letter.

For some reason, we thought that adopting an older 'special needs' child would make the process SO much faster and it really has NOT. When we started this whole thing in Aug. 2008 our son was a 6-year-old and now he's an 8-year-old and will be 9 this November. There's a LOT of change for a child in those years and we've missed them all sitting here without any control over the process. Very frustrating and emotional all around.

But then last week we finally got confirmation from the orphanage that Ray did receive the Christmas gift we sent him and really liked it. And this week we got a message from the orphanage through our agency stating that they will be sending your "To Whom" letter soon. “Soon” is a notoriously ambiguous term from Thailand - it could mean a week or months. But it is encouraging to hear that it is on the horizon and indeed coming our way - I hope it is in fact very soon!

So it feels like a happy holiday weekend even if we just received "a little bone to chew on" related to our adoption of our beloved son...who seems so far away right now.

Referral Paperwork for our Smiling Boy

2009-12-23T17:36:00.002-06:00

We can’t help but to take a look back and reflect on our Christmas letter from last year and know that one piece is still missing. We had hoped that this Christmas our prayers would be answered with a trip to Thailand, but we continue to try to be patient and trust that it’s in God’s Hands and His timing.

Last Friday, we received our "official referral" paperwork from the Thai Red Cross in the mail, minus the To Whom It May Concern letter that we are still waiting on from the Thai government (DSDW). So now we can get through it all and be ready to go when the DSDW sends the letter. The TRC even sent a few newer photos which made us smile since WACAP did not see him when they were there last month. Even though the photos are just printed on computer paper, our hearts cannot help but glow as we see his smiling face while he holds up photos of us. Every little glimpse of our son or step in the process helps boost our morale.

Merry Christmas to all!
Ann and Bryan

Snowflakes

2009-11-21T17:32:00.020-06:00

"Adoptions are like snowflakes – no two are exactly alike."

Sometimes it feels inspiring, like a piece of artwork:

Sometimes it feels calculated, like a scientific experiment:

Sometimes it feels tedious, like endless paperwork and mailings:

And unfortunately...Sometimes it feels like you have no control
and someone higher up is messing with you:

At least we try to keep a good sense of humor through it all!

Photo Credits:
1) Where Snowflakes Are Born by Vlad Studio
2) Wilson Bentley's Snowflakes
3) US Postal Service Holiday Snowflakes by Kenneth Libbrecht - 2006
4) Chicken Giggle - I Love Snowflakes

Happy Birthday, Ray!

2009-11-04T12:45:00.017-06:00

Your fortune cookie reads:
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." - Lao Tzu

You were born in the Year of the Snake (same as Mommy and Daddy). People born during the Year of the Snake are kind, vibrant, intelligent, wise, introspective and refined.

You share your birthday with:
Eli Mattson, Laura W. Bush, Will Rogers, Walter Cronkite, and Matthew McConaughey

In the US Astrology Calendar, you are a Scorpio (just like Mommy). Scorpios are loyal, passionate, resourceful, observant, and dynamic.

You were born on a Sunday which means your Thai birthday color is Red. Buddha image for Sunday: Pang Tawai Natra, restraint. Sunday Character: respectable, carefree, wise, and beloved by both friends and relatives. Very lucky day/color : Wednesday / Green (Mommy's favorite color).

On this date, W.A. Mozart's Symphony No. 36 received its première performance in Linz, Austria in 1783. Mommy is listening to it right now!

Happy 8th Birthday! We hope you enjoy the gifts you should be receiving from us today and know that you are loved from around the world!!!

Adopting the Waiting Child

2009-10-30T12:02:00.004-05:00

This is a lovely video I found on Kristine Fornek's page at adoptionvoices.com. It is so wonderful, I had to re-post and share it with you all on our blog. Enjoy! - Ann

Gifts for Ray's 8th Birthday

2009-10-21T12:44:00.004-05:00

A new Mickey Mouse t-shirt for our son...
he'll fit in this animated family quite well!

Showing off the drawing he sent us in March!
We also were able to track down a few items of Doraemon,
the Japanese cartoon character that Ray likes (to match stickers he put on our drawing). Thanks, Dad, for snapping these photos for us!

WACAP will be bringing these items to the TRC the first week in November, just in time for Ray's 8th birthday on the 4th. We hope he can feel our love from around the world!

The Waiting Game

2009-10-11T14:04:00.002-05:00

I went to an adoption conference on Saturday all about attachment and bonding that was led by the author of "The Connected Child," Dr. Karyn Purvis. It was very inspiring to see that, with the right kind of nurturing, any child can recover from a harmful or impoverished history. And you could clearly see that Dr. Purvis was very passionate about working with kids from hard places. It was touching yet realistic. I am glad I went and gained some tools and knowledge to help us for the future to bring Ray closer to us emotionally and help heal his wounds of loss.

I met up with the Huwe's at the conference and it was great talking to them about their Thai adoption of their son who's now been in their home for a year. They gave me some insight and reminded me that the waiting is so worth it. Plus, I realized that, although we started the adoption process in August 2008, the REAL timeline for processing started when the dossier is in Thailand. That happened at the end of February 2009. So, realistically, we have not waited as long as most families typically do for older children (about 12 months). Of course, the WACAP website says that waiting ranges from 6-12 months, in which case, we're in that time frame now. So, in our minds, we have adjusted the thought that we'd travel in November to being more realistic in thinking perhaps we'll travel by February 2010. It would be the most wonderful Valentine's Day gift on the planet!

Thanks, again, for all the prayers and support! We truly appreciate all your kind words!!!
- Ann

Fall Doubts

2009-09-28T17:08:00.000-05:00

Still no news and no paperwork from Thailand. We have another new social worker at WACAP named Liz and she lived in Thailand for a little while and speaks the language. Hopefully this is a good thing and perhaps she'll be able to pull through with our paperwork. We can only hope and pray. But, still, the way things are going it looks like we may be waiting until early 2010 to bring Ray home. We were really looking forward to Christmas with him this year and we're saddened to think it may not happen by then.

So, until we hear something...we'll continue to prepare his room, read up on parenting and bonding, read articles online, chat online with other adoptive families, attend adoption conferences, learn the Thai language, and cherish the photos and videos we have of him all over our house. We already have some bilingual books and CDs to send to him with WACAP's upcoming trip, in time for his 8th birthday on November 4th. We even got a new family-friendly vehicle (Vibe) so we're ready to haul him and his friends around to school activities. Gotta keep moving forward...even if the paperwork is at a halt.

Please keep those prayers going Ray's direction!

One Year Since Application

2009-08-18T16:45:00.000-05:00

It's hard to believe that today marks one year since we submitted our applications for adoption with Special Children and WACAP. It seems long and yet we cannot believe where the time went.

We received an update phone call from WACAP yesterday to let us know that they are expecting to hear of our DSDW approval letter any day now but also that they do not understand why it has taken this long since all paperwork on our side and the TRC side is complete. Kate seems just as frustrated as we are with no answers. She also mentioned something about Ray's child history/medical info being possibly outdated since it was July 2008. She was hoping to get some answers from her boss and from the TRC this week.

Please keep Ray and our family in your prayers for some answers and some movement in our process.

Looking Back - Choosing Thailand

2009-07-26T21:15:00.003-05:00

While trying not to think too much about our waiting, I had some time to reflect on our decision to adopt from Thailand and the amazing links afterwords.

We had the hardest time selecting a country from which to adopt a child. When the whole world has children needing families, it's hard to just pick one country! Because we wanted an older child between ages 3-7, we were told to go international since the US kids in that age range were hard to find as "adoptable." So then came hard choices for us such as: how much could we afford, how long could we afford to be in another country and away from our jobs, what type of interracial family could we parent, how long could we emotionally wait for a child. These were so hard and so stressful to answer only a year ago. Reading books, researching agencies, and looking up country requirements was intense. We prayed long and hard on this issue, too. The best info and support I found actually came from the Yahoo! chat groups of people going through the same things or those that have already gone through the process. I cannot thank you all enough for your advice.

In the collective information, it seemed we had to make a choice between the "chicken and the egg" theory as to whether to choose a country first or an agency first. So then I switched gears and signed up for tons of info packets from agencies...another overwhelming decision...more hard praying. What helped here was our friend, Wendy, who recommended her social worker, Deb, from Special Children for our homestudy. Deb gave us lots of info on other agencies and countries. Then we got several waiting children photo listings in the mail. The one from WACAP seemed the most interesting, detailed, and had the most children listed with correctable special needs. We requested a CD of info on 10 children, without knowing which countries they were from. After viewing that CD, it pretty much sealed the deal for us with WACAP and the country choice. When 7 out of the 10 children we chose for more info came from Thailand, it was pretty clear where we would be going on our journey. And, of course, seeing Ray's smiling face and the name connection with my grandfather seemed like a match made in heaven (and probably is thanks to all that hard praying).

Since then, we've connected online with tons of families adopting from Thailand...all of whom are helpful, prayerful, and resourceful...a few of whom we got to meet at the Thai Fest in Madison last September. We've come to know our pharmacist so much better since he's from Thailand and even visited the TRC for us back in February when he was there on holiday. His ex-wife and kids live in Thailand and they may help us around while we're there. My in-laws' banker is also from Thailand and she has expressed interest in helping me in language transition. My cousin has a friend who is teaching in Bangkok and can meet us when we're there. I just switched jobs in May to a company who manufactures a good portion of their business for a company in Thailand (can you believe that?!?). And our new pastor that arrived this month, just hosted two exchange students from Thailand. I'm SO amazed...especially living in a city of little over 10,000 people...to find these connections! God truly works in mysterious ways.

So, to those of you still in the country/agency decision phase, take heart and know that God is listening and will guide you with a shining light on the path you choose.

Father's Day Gift

2009-06-09T17:06:00.001-05:00

Bryan really wanted to send something to Ray in honor of Father's Day. So, we bought him Mickey Mouse sunglasses and then took pictures of our stuffed Mickey wearing them and us wearing our sunglasses.We also got him airplane Legos and a 3-D Slide Viewer with Disney slides. We sent the package to the director at the TRC and hopefully it will get there by Sunday for the holiday!

TRC Board Approval

2009-05-01T15:57:00.003-05:00

We got an email from WACAP today stating that we have been officially approved by the TRC board for adoption of Ray and that they will be sending our files to the DSDW very soon. Kate guesses they will send it within the next week. It's great to know that our files are in process to the Thai government. Of course, we've been told it's still another 2-6 months at least before we get the referral. It cannot go fast enough for us!

Easter Surprise Video

2009-04-10T17:30:00.006-05:00

We got our WACAP package in the mail today with the CD of photos (which were already emailed), a video CD and the actual drawing that Ray made for us! I never thought we'd get the real thing and am SO excited. It's on our refrigerator already!!! PLUS...the video is wonderfully touching. On it, they show him opening our gift of Packer and Badger clothing...which he is not too thrilled about since he was probably looking for toys. Then, the SW pulls out our letter with the photos of us with his clothes and he instantly has a HUGE smile on his face and starts to put on the Packer jersey with excitement. I could (and probably will) watch this video over and over again. It made both Bryan and I cry to see the connection we already have with our little guy, even if we're worlds apart.

New Photos

2009-04-08T16:00:00.002-05:00

We got new photos of Ray via email from WACAP today! He's looking so much older...makes us want to bring him home even more now. Best of all, WACAP took a photo of the picture he drew for us of him flying on a large bird towards Mommy and Daddy. It brought tears of joy to our eyes!

2009-03-15T19:50:00.001-05:00

We had fun putting together a gift package for Ray tonight. WACAP is visiting the TRC next week and we're sending him three t-shirts and two shorts. Thought it would be nice to get him some Wisconsin-wear (Badger t-shirt, Packers jersey, Packers t-shirt). Then we wrote him a letter and included pictures of Bryan and I wearing our Wisconsin-wear next to his outfit (see above).

I-800A Approval

2009-02-21T14:30:00.003-06:00

We just got our I-800A approval notice in the mail today! WOW! I was told to expect this would take 90 days to be approved. That means it took less than 30 days from the day the USCIS received it officially!!! Yipee! Things are moving along just wonderfully. Now we just need to hope they continue to progress at this fast rate and that the TRC and the DSDW will approve our match and approve the adoption of Ray in the earliest possible time frame (4 months is the early estimate).

Dossier Off To Thailand

2009-02-18T21:47:00.003-06:00

WACAP sent our dossier off to Thailand this afternoon after receiving it from the month-long US verification journey through Washington state and the Thai Embassy in DC. We're SO excited!!! One step closer to the 20-hour flight to finally meeting our son most likely this year in Bangkok!

Finger Printing Next Step

2009-02-02T22:42:00.002-06:00

We got our finger printing appointment in the mail today. We're set to be in Milwaukee on Thursday, Feb. 12th at Noon. Of course, this is slightly inconvenient since that same night is opening night of the musical I'm performing in on stage in Egg Harbor...but we'll make it work! No rescheduling for us...onward and fast as we can!!!

Dossier Found!

2009-01-16T21:29:00.002-06:00

Whew! Kate called late today to let us know she found our original dossier docs! What a relief. I knew it had to be there somewhere and Kate wasn't going to rest until she found it. Hopefully now she can get them processed through the US system ASAP and over to the TRC so we can keep movin' right along. Thanks to all for your prayers...they must have worked!!!

Discouraged

2009-01-12T21:01:00.003-06:00

Well, I'd like to say that the new year is starting off on a good note for our adoption BUT it's not. I know it's not Kate's fault that she stepped into Andrea's job and cannot find our WACAP dossier documents. I'm just frustrated, disappointed, and sad. Thank goodness I made copies of everything before I sent it. But I still think I'm going to have to redo some documents and I have to take new outdoor photos (in winter...yuck). It feels like one huge step backwards. I just wish our dossier could have been processed in December since I sent them Dec. 5th and WACAP received them Dec. 8th. But there's nothing I can control once the paperwork is out of my hands. So I just have to pray that now that there's been this mistake on WACAP's behalf, they will work even harder and faster to get our files organized and processed. There's really no one to blame...it's just human error. But Ray is still waiting...that's what hurts the most.

Holiday Thoughts

2008-12-23T20:00:00.002-06:00

In this Christmas season, I try to remember that thousands of people waited years and years for Jesus to arrive and when he did, it was more of a blessing than anyone could imagine. So, we can certainly wait one year or more for Ray to arrive and I am sure it will also mean more to us than we can imagine.

Merry Christmas, Ray! And thanks to God for guiding us on this path together.

Dossier Completed

2008-12-05T22:07:00.001-06:00

Phew! The last document was notarized at 9:00am today and I mailed the packet of Dossier forms, photos, and copies to WACAP right after that via Express Mail so they should have it on Monday morning. What does this mean? We made it through all the major paperwork until we hear back from the Thai government next year. That's a load off our shoulders! And as soon as our homestudy makes it into the right hands at WACAP, we'll have our USCIS papers submitted and Andrea will get going on approving the Dossier and getting it over to Thailand hopefully sometime in January or early February. So now we wait. AND now its time to get serious about learning some of the Thai language. Never a dull moment!!!

Thanksgiving Blessing

2008-11-27T22:02:00.002-06:00

We backed out of the garage today to go to the relatives house for the holiday and stopped before leaving the driveway because there was a UPS package leaned against the front door. Low and behold, it was our long-awaited WACAP package with Ray's updated photos, video, and interview information! We are extremely thankful this arrived today and we were able to see our soon-to-be son showing off his English homework. I just wish we could give him a big hug!

Plus, on Monday night we got an email from Patti and Gene Bellavance with their photos of Ray and their son Mark that they just took while visiting the TRC this week. They are in Thailand visiting their relatives and told me they would say hi to Ray for us and send pictures. I never thought they would email them directly from Thailand. That was extremely kind and we appreciate it so much! We actually got many more photos from them than the two we got from WACAP. We cherish all the info and photos we can get and are amazed at the Bellavance family's generous friendship, even if we've never met in person. We hope that Mark and Ray can remain great friends once Ray's home with us.

It really is a small world, after all! Happy Thanksgiving to All!!!

Disney Connection...Meant To Be

2008-11-13T20:35:00.001-06:00

If you don't know me, I have always been a HUGE Disney and Mickey fan. So much so that I had Bryan wear a special order tux vest with black embroidered Mickey Mouse faces all over it for our wedding. Then, we went to Disney World for our Honeymoon. Plus I've been to Disneyland Paris and will be going to Disneyland California during this upcoming vacation. And Ray's room is already decorated with Mickey Mouse. We even sent him a Mickey Mouse yo-yo when WACAP went to Thailand at the end of October.

Well, we got an email via WACAP from a TRC social worker regarding our pictures yesterday.
From a social worker at the TRC: "I told Ray about his coming family he seems very happy with them and the idea that they will become family. He draw lots of pictures for his coming Mommy & Daddy. You know what, Ray loves Mickey mouse and I was very glad when I saw the Mickey mouse on his coming Daddy's pull over also on their chair at home. Ray had a big smile when I show him their photos."

I'm so very excited that Ray loves Mickey Mouse. It is these little connections that make us even more positive that this is God's plan for us and for Ray. We cannot wait to have him in our family!

Orphanage Pre-Approval

2008-11-06T21:56:00.000-06:00

We’ve received news from the Thai Red Cross Children's Home (orphanage in Bangkok, Thailand) that our Home Study draft was reviewed and based on the information therein – they have given our family pre-approval. They are asking for our official dossier ASAP.

Ray is at the TRC so we need first to be matched and accepted by the TRC. After TRC approval our file goes to the Thai DSDW for final approval.

This is GREAT news! I think it means that he is now "on hold" for us at both our agency (WACAP) and the orphanage (TRC)...so he's really ours!

I have already been collecting the dossier documents but thought WACAP wouldn't want them until Feb-March next year once the USCIS papers are finalized. That's not the case...we can submit our dossier waaaaay before the immigration papers are finalized. SO...I will be sure to get moving on the rest of the documents to hopefully have them to WACAP before this month ends (even though we're on vacation 11/14-11/22).

YIPEE!!!

Election Day More Than Voting

2008-11-04T17:45:00.001-06:00

Our social worker in the family finders program let us know last week that WACAP has matched us with Ray, the little boy we were hoping to be matched with all this time. And TODAY is his birthday! Happy 7th Birthday, Ray (Ratchata in Thai). We're coming as fast as we can!!!

It's My Birthday

2008-10-28T00:01:00.002-05:00

And I'm so glad for all the family and friends that surround me with love and support every day. I cannot wait to have a son to share in this wonderful life with me and my hubby.

I'm impatiently waiting for updated photos and video from WACAP. They said it would take 10 business days to sort everything out. So probably by my cousin, Molly's birthday (Nov. 10), we'll have some new images of our soon-to-be matched son! I probably won't share these photos with anyone outside our immediate family until the Thai government gives us the official match sometime next year. Just in case he slips out of our reach. But once we have the matched papers signed with WACAP, I may start giving out his name and some details...just cause we're so excited!

Love to all, Ann

WACAP in Thailand

2008-10-19T21:32:00.002-05:00

So, the CEO of WACAP is now in Thailand and we're so excited because this means when she gets back, we'll get updated photos, info, and questions answered about the child we're so close to having a hold on. In the midst of all this paperwork and red tape, it's nice to remember that there's a child waiting for a loving family...just like we're waiting for him.

Home Study Draft

2008-10-09T13:18:00.002-05:00

Yipee! I just got our home study draft via email from Special Children. So tonight I can read it through thoroughly and check for errors, omissions, and grammar errors. Then WACAP will have to review it, and then the state/feds need to approve it. But this gets us one step closer!

Also, the CEO of WACAP is visiting the orphanages in Thailand next week and she is going to take a copy of the HS draft with her to show to the Thai social workers so they know about us ahead of time which, I'm hoping, will make the referral process go faster next year.

Yipee! Thanks for all the support and prayers...they must be working!

All-Day Education

2008-10-05T13:05:00.002-05:00

On Saturday, we went to an all-day international adoption educational workshop provided by Bethany Christian Services and located at Brookfield Christian Reformed Church. It was eight hours of full immersion into the world of adoption...talking about grief and loss, attachment and bonding, race and culture, and getting to share stories with other adoptive families and adoptees. I think is was great information, maybe a little overload for one day, and I'm glad we did it together. This will help us get on the same page for preparation of having a Thai child in our family.

Thai Connection

2008-09-27T16:35:00.002-05:00

I found out today that our pharmacist is from Thailand. Who would have guessed that we'd find someone in Door County from the same country we're adopting a child from and who is more than willing to help us with cultural and language transitions. God must really be guiding us through this journey with his helping hands!!!

Thai Fest

2008-09-17T22:07:00.002-05:00

We had a great time at Thai Fest on Sunday in Madison at the Olbrich Gardens. It was a little rainy and wet but still interesting. We got to see Thai dancers, musicians, a traditional wedding ceremony and check out the ornate Thai pavilion surrounded by lovely gardens. We ate some spicy Thai curry dishes and met some wonderful people who I've gotten to know via email and Yahoo chat groups. It was inspiring to see other adoptive families with their Thai children and know that it will happen for us too some day.

Home Study Visit Complete

2008-09-07T22:09:00.001-05:00

Things went VERY smoothly yesterday. In fact, they went so well that Bryan was almost worried it went too well. I guess he needs to worry about something. I'm very happy with how it turned out. Deb was very nice and, since she knows Wendy Will and the Erickson side from being a regular Shallows Resort guest, it felt like she already knew a little about me. She interviewed us for 2.5 hours about our lives, our childhood, our values, and how and why we want to adopt and raise a child. Then the last half hour we gave her a tour of our house and finished filling out some paperwork with her help.

So, now we need to get physicals and have the doctor fill out specific papers. Then we'll need to start filling out immigration paperwork and cross our fingers that the government processes it in a timely manor. She said its taking about 4-5 months when it used to take 2-3 months. New regulations have made it more difficult to adopt internationally. It's really unfortunate, but we're willing to take on the challenge of waiting. We also need to send in our old passports to be updated...but that shouldn't take too long.

In order to place a "hold" on a specific child, we also need to fill out a Parenting Resource Plan that is quite elaborate and will need some heavy research on our end. It's things like childcare plans, ESL options, special needs resources in schools, child counselors in the area, etc. It makes me wonder why new birth mom's aren't required to do these things...after all, the information will be useful.

Anyway, I think our fears were unwarranted and there really was nothing to worry about with the home study process. It will take our social worker, Deb, about 3-4 weeks to write up her findings and then send them to our international agency, WACAP, for their review. We have to do 18 hours of education on parenting an older adopted child and I'm looking forward to that. The more prepared we are, the better. Then its on to another set of paperwork called the Dossier to be compiled for the Thailand government's review. We'll hopefully have all this finished by the end of the year. Then it's a waiting game. Feels like, hurry up and wait!

So there you have it. Thank you all for the contributions and for your prayers! We really appreciate all your support and love!

Home Study Surprise!

2008-09-03T12:34:00.000-05:00

We've just found out today that we can move our home study to an earlier date so we can get the whole process in motion faster to be considered for a specific child who has caught our attention. This means our home study is going to be THIS SATURDAY!!! Yikes...that's fast! We're excited and a little nervous too. Keep good thoughts coming our way and we'll keep you posted!

Paperwork Race

2008-09-02T22:26:00.002-05:00

We learned today that the child we've registered interest in with WACAP's Promise Child program had another family register interest and they are slightly ahead of us with paperwork as their home study is this week. I'm hoping to get ahold of Deb at Special Children tomorrow to see if she can come sooner than our originally scheduled appointment of Sept. 27th. Cross your fingers!

Country & Agencies Chosen

2008-08-18T16:58:00.000-05:00

After months of researching countries and agencies, we've finally decided to go with WACAP's waiting children program for a Thai boy (www.wacap.org). We've sent in the pre-application for the Family Finders program today and intend to start our home study with Special Children, Inc. (www.specialchildreninc.com) in Wisconsin next month.

Which Country?

2008-08-08T12:56:00.002-05:00

I had a good conversation with a social worker from Bethany's headquarters in Michigan today. She told me the real statistics and the reality of adopting from the countries we were thinking of through their agency. Afterwards, I am seriously thinking we should consider another country that would not have such a long wait. In which case, we'd be looking into other agencies. Perhaps this is another sign that we should go with our gut and instinct and use Deb at Special Children to guide us.

Wendy Will's Friend Deb

2008-08-06T12:16:00.002-05:00

I just had a great phone conversation with Wendy Will's friend Deb, who happens to be a social worker for Special Children, Inc. out of Elm Grove, WI. She's staying at The Shallows this week. Ironically, I've been emailing with her boss for the last week and getting great advice from the emails. Now that I've connected with Deb so well and gotten wonderful insights from her and her boss, I'm almost thinking we should use them as our home study agency regardless of which international agency or country we choose. This is contrary to my thought process about a month ago when I was sure that going with an all-in-one (home study and international programs) agency would be the best. But, it's very comforting and assuring to find people that are excited and energetic about helping with the process.

Waiting Children

2008-08-01T18:16:00.001-05:00

I've requested info on specific waiting children from WACAP's listings. According to Beth at WACAP, seven of the ten I'm interested in are from Thailand. Perhaps that's a sign. So now I await the DVD with the first four boys medical history, photos and videos. I cannot wait!

Bulgaria Option

2008-07-31T17:49:00.000-05:00

It's been recommended to me by some chat groups and social workers to check out the Bulgaria program since its just reopened and would have lots of children in the age range we're looking for available. I've contacted Holt, Carolina Adoption Services, and Americans for International Aid and Adoption. Holt gave me lots of info but ultimately said we would not qualify. I was very unhappy with this news. CAS said we would still be eligible if we have a letter indicating our ability to parent. I never heard anything from AIAA. So...because its "iffy" we may go back to the original option of Thailand.

Chicken Before the Egg?

2008-07-16T19:48:00.003-05:00

So now my question is, do we choose an agency first or do we choose a country first and find an agency that had a good reputation in that country? I ask this because I'm starting to question the country choices we would have through Bethany because those countries place so few children through Bethany in Wisconsin each year that we may be waiting 3-4 years for a child. Several of the books and internet resources say to choose the country first since the child we adopt will want to know about their origin and we should therefore be interested heavily in that country. So now I'm going to start emailing agencies about Bulgaria and Thailand as I have become interested in those countries even though Bethany doesn't work in those places.

Bethany Meeting

2008-07-11T20:09:00.003-05:00

We met with a social worker from Bethany Christian Service today after several email conversations over the last month. She was very nice and accommodating as we met in Green Bay rather than having to go to their offices in Fond Du Lac. She had a large list of waiting children with her and showed us a DVD of their international programs. We were both impressed and felt comfortable with her. This may be the agency for us. She helped us explore the countries that might work for us including The Philippines, South Korea, Lithuania, and Albania. I intend to research these country programs even more now.

Thailand Option

2008-06-30T19:39:00.002-05:00

I received info from WACAP via email today about their Thailand waiting child program and it sounds interesting. Wouldn't that be interesting if I, after having played Anna in The King and I, would adopt a child from Bangkok?!? I'll have to check this option out more thoroughly.

Information Meeting & Books

2008-06-24T21:00:00.003-05:00

We went to Community Adoption Center in Green Bay for a two-hour info session. It was interesting to hear the stories of the other two couples there. But the social worker running the meeting started by saying they deal mostly with infertile couples looking to adopt infants. This concerned us since we have chosen adoption not because of fertility PLUS would like to adopt a toddler age 3-6. So I have to wonder if they would be experienced enough to help us. Plus, most of the information presented I already knew because of the books I've been reading.

I've been reading: The Complete Book of Adoption by Godwin, The Complete Book of International Adoption by Davenport, and The Russian Adoption Handbook by Maclean. Lots of good info...but a little overwhelming, I have to admit.

First Contact

2008-05-02T18:03:00.000-05:00

We had a phone meeting with a social worker from Lutheran Social Services today. She forgot to call us at the scheduled time and so we called 40 minutes later. Then she didn't have our information right and didn't have the answers to our questions. I have to say it made me very nervous to go with this agency. First impressions mean a lot to us both. So...I guess we'll keep searching.

Very Beginning

2008-04-25T18:37:00.002-05:00

Started emailing adoption agencies today. Bryan promised me that we could start actively looking into adoption once we hit our 2 year anniversary. So I figured I could start by gathering info from agencies that appear to be Christian based and also from places other people have suggested. I suppose this means we'll be getting tons of packets via email and snail mail but we have to start somewhere. Here we go...Yipee!